I know.. i've only stepped into this PLU circle barely 4 months ago. But sometimes.. a lot of times.. i think to myself, 'Is this just how it's all gonna be?'
4 months ain't a long time, but sometimes, i think i've seen enough. So much so that i'm getting disappointed. Disappointed with most of the PLUs around. Disappointed with the only train of thought PLUs have.
When i say i'm disappointed with how most PLUs think, i'm not saying bout the sex-crazed ppl PLUs are. That is already an undisputed fact, and we can't deny it, much as we try to. PLUs will always have sex in mind.
I am referring to one thing that i just realised. When you browse through others' profiles, are you really having a 'looking for friends' thought in mind? I guess not.
This one thing i find it strange. PLUs seem to be able to just jump straight into the 'I like you, can you be my boyfriend?' pool before being friends first. Since when did boyfriends come BEFORE friends?
Can't we just be friends, and not having to think whether we want the other guy as a boyfriend all the time? I know right now, i really want a partner (be it guy or girl) but what i need now.. are friends.
Ever since i got to know him, i've always felt he wanted more than being my gogor. Yet friends are all i've ever wanted us to be. I seriously never thought of getting further than that.
He asked me. I refused. Now he wanted to break off contact, maybe forever. I'm hurt, not only for losing someone i thought i can be comfortable with, but with the fact that PLUs can't be friends without one falling for the other at some point in their friendship.
I've heard and seen how fast boyfriends can be made and unmade. One day they can be boyfriends, the next they'll treat it like nothing ever happened. Seriously, is love among PLUs so trivial we can discard it just like that?
Maybe that's the only reason preventing me from getting into a relationship with any PLU, besides me having super high standards, even though i'm not that 'marketable' at all in the first place. If someone who barely knew me had asked that question, i'll reply NO, point blank, without a second thought. Call me cold-hearted, say i have a heart of stone, say i'm void of feelings, i don't care. I'm an extremely insecure bastard, and if being boyfriends is what you have in mind FIRST when you contacted me, don't blame me if i refused without hesitation.
Yes, i know i feel very insecure bout being boyfriends before being friends first. That's why i'd not gotten into any relationship at all. But all i want to know is..
..can't we just be friends?
12 comments:
Just tell em, 'I will have sex with you, there is no need for the boyfriend thingy to come in.'
Boyfriend,boyfriend, these are all excuses to get into one's pants.
Yeah, i know what you mean. I lost count of all the people who couldn't accept anything less than friendship.
If that's their mindset, then so be it. Decent folks are few and far in between, but they exist.
aisay 4 mths is reli a quick judgement day leh. i took 2 yrs plus n plus n plus.
i agree with u dat bf comes later after being frens. ppl wan fast bf la. esp those leng cai 1s cus scared they kena grab by some else. hehe
Ermm not all gorgor like dat u know. i got 2 didi leh. susah mau jadi gorgor leh. owuz kena buli n kena kacau. haha. duno y ppl treat bro as steping stone for bf
haiz, love is suppose 2 b made 2 last. but ppl like to break. do u know y it call broke back mountain ah?
aiyo u not superman ma. just human n being frens. nvm la u can market here hehe. Cheers ! Gambateh dude.
wow, came across ur blog from a link...very nice writing style...about the friends thing, i guess it is sad to lose a friend..but u must also understand some PLUS do fall in love cos the choice they have is so limited, 10% of the male population and so they think they must catch on to someone fast...also its difficult to remain friends once someone falls for someone...its just weird after...i must agree though that some ppl fall in love and out of love wayyyy too fast...they dun think properly n simply jump into the relationship at the first instance of attraction which is often not love...
Why love when there is lust? LOL.
uhmnn well... that's the thing i can't understand too.. uhmnn well.. maybe just because everything is trying to catching up the trend-being coupled ahahah.. So uhmnn they need an instant BF hahaha...
shine: yeah.. since when did boyfriend mean the same thing as sex partner.. ^^"
louis: i know they exist. they juz dunno i exist >.<
cibetronic: haha market here? ok lor.. 20 170 56 bukit jalil.. who want.. get a number and wait for ur turn.. i'll be with u in a min =P
hcpen: thx.. nice of u to drop by hehe. sorry i didn't hv time to read thru ur blog yet ^^" (and i can't read chi)
rcks: how true. =P
ceusm: is instant bf the 'in' thing now? oh.. i think i already knew that..
darling,
let me assure you there ARE those who wants to be just friends, just maybe smaller in numbers that's all...
when i started to look for frens i encounter much of the same treatment, and i asked my ex, "cant we know people to be just friends?" he was sceptical.. but i've found friends, and one of them is my current ROOMATE somemore, just good frens and nothing more.
So, seek and ye shall find!
alternatively u can try shine's suggestion ... :)
friends first.... no boyfriend before friends... that's my rule
I think you got to be comfortable with yourself first and know what you want. If anyone came along into your life and you feel that he is not being a friend (as so very normal in this circle), hey just cut him off. Sometimes, we can be friends to them but dont let people bully you.
I found some really good friends in this circle but that is after meeting like a few dozens of jerks too. So dont give up hope and be good to yourself. ;)
This is very common among gays, what they want is SEX, SEX and SEX. Don't be sad. There is still hope. Since you are still new in PLU circle, sooner or later you will get used to them :). You can always choose to ignore people that you don't like. Just like love, friendship also needs right place at the right timing. Cheer up.
你相信缘分吗？
Do you believe in destiny?
如果你相信的话，要来的时候他一定会来到你身边.
If you do, when the timing is right, he will comes to you.
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