Green is the colour of jealousy.
I just came back from my posting in some ulu hospital.. and i do know what i'm coming home to. So his ex is coming over to stay at his place for a few days. Do i feel jealous?
Hehe. Who won't. On one hand i'm pretty much for his ex coming over to visit him.. i dunno. I just don't want to change his life too much. Like, he shouldn't do anything just because i would feel better if he does it, like breaking off contact with someone.
On the other hand, i'm feeling uneasy.. scared? Maybe. Much as i trust him, it's me myself that i have to battle with in the end. Not many people know i used to suffer from inferiority complex (tho i'm much better now). Sometimes i fear not being able to measure up to his expectations, not being able to measure up to others. That i'm not good enough, don't talk as much, is so immature at times, etc etc.
Just now when i called him, he just hanged up on me before i could even say "i love you". Ok, he's on the train next to his ex, and probably it's weird for him. I myself don't say those 3 words to him when i'm around my friends too. Hmm. So why is this heart getting jealous?
Sigh. Not that it affects me much. His ex could move in to stay with him for all he wants. My opponent isn't him, it's myself. I gotta be brave, have trust in us. Which is what i'll do =). True love will withstand everything, and if it doesn't, then it isn't true love to begin with.
I'm scared, but i'll be brave. I will =)
3 comments:
wow...u're much braver then me lol i would nvr allow the ex to stay with the current i think. too much temptation :S
well.. i try to be. nth much i could do if he wants to spend time with his ex. i'm trying not to be too possessive hehe.
always thought i had very high expectations from a lover.. now that i have one, i realised i don't ask for much from him ^^". the last thing i wanna be is a whiny bf
let things be.. like u said.. true love can withstand even the strongest wind...
and true love takes time to develop.. and we're looking at years.. hugs..
Post a Comment